5.31.2011

Grateful for stuff!

Hiya, kids!

Welcome to the final Grateful post for May.  Side note:  I can't believe it's June tomorrow!  Where the H did this month go?!  I'm fairly certain that it got blown away with all this bloody wind.  I thought it was May, not March, man!
  • I'll start with crossing a little something off my bucket list.  That little something being going to Gasthof's!!!!  I've wanted to go there since, you know, I was 21.  I've just never gone.  Thinking about it now, that's friggin' ridiculous.  I decided that I wanted to pitch a tent right then and there and live there.  Some day, I need to live in Bavaria, baby.
  • Next, I'll give props to Mr. Sunshine.  Not the junky show starring my favorite Friend, but the warming ball of gas in the sky.  The last couple of weeks have tottered between being junk and being glorious.  Much like today.  It was beautiful for a while there, and now it's total ass out there.  Back to the sunshine.  I love that I've gotten not only my first but my SECOND sunburn of the year this weekend!!!!!  Bring on the melanoma!  (sidenote:  JOKE)  There's just something I adore about that sun kids.  Maybe I'll check out the Vitamin D like my friend Megs did.  Maybe my obsession with the sun and warmth in the warm months, and my moody blues in the colder months have something to do with that?  Who knows.  For now though, I'm going to just going to try to soak up as much of it as I can.  Also, I'll start using sunblock, I promise.  Burns are dumb.
  • Gardening!  HELL of a workout.  I'm still a sore mutha from Saturday and Monday's gardening shenanigans.  (sidenote:  TOTALLY worth it!  My babies are all planted!).
  • Related:  The crazy stuff you can find at garden stores!  I went to one out here in the boonies, and I found some awesome stuff!  From an 8-foot, $700 metal giraffe to a 6" banana plant to about 20 kinds of tomatoes.  My current favorite thing that I found at said garden store is a CURRY PLANT!!!  I'm so freaking stoked.  I was poking around in the herbs, looking for rosemary (found it!) and grabbed what I thought was rosemary.  NOPE.  It was stinkin' curry!  I love herbs because you just rub those leaves and you can smell it for hours.  I was salivating for Indian for the rest of the day - despite all the dirt and soap from gardening and washing it off.  I could smell that curry all afternoon, and I loved it.
  • The Amazon MP3 store.  I love using one of those song "hearing" apps and then finding it on the Amazon store.  It's soooo convenient.  Which my little bank account is saying "PUMP THE BRAKES" to, but meh.  I love music, and I love that I can download it from the application to my phone.  Read also:  all the way to my computer.  Woo!
  • My cooky hubby.  That guy just knows what he's doing with food.  Oh, PS - that's "cook-y" as in, he likes to cook.  Not a typo of "kooky."  ha.  He has totally pulled off smoking lately - he's a kick ass dude.  However, all that delicious meat isn't so good for the waistline, you know?  His amazing food is helping me practice portion control like very few things before it has.  :)  Yet another thing about that guy that's pretty cool.
Okie dokie!  That's what I've got for this week.

Oh, also?  I'm .4 lbs away from emerging on the other side of another "10."  WHAT UPPPPPPP!?

Number two:  I CANNOT find a swim suit!!!!  I need something that's not a halter, and isn't a million dollars.  I've tried roughly 15, and I just can't find a single one that I like.  UGH.

5.27.2011

Happy Friday!!

Yes, my life is that interesting - I'm blogging on a Friday night.  Did I mention that I have not one, but two cats sitting next to me?  How am I married?!  :)

Anyway.  To The Reason of the post.

I need to work on meal planning.  REALLY need to work on meal planning.  I just suck at it.  I know that it's something that I really need to do to give myself absolutely no excuses for not eating well.  But seriously.  I don't want to plan what I'm having way before I want to have it.  Mostly because it involves thinking about food when I'm not hungry.  I just don't want to make those calls before I think about what I want.

Now, that being said, I do realize that I need to get over that.  It's a fact that people who shop when they're hungry tend to go outside of their food plans (if they have any).  Plain and simple, it's not a good plan.

I'm not talking just about grocery shopping and home-prepped meals either.  I'm talking also about the surprise lunches at work or the "hey, let's just go grab something" meals that pop up.  Por ejemplo, today we went to Arby's.  The 'ol chicken club thingy (no mayo, natch - could have done without the cheese that I couldn't actually taste too...), which wasn't horrible - 350 cals.  Not bad for a full sammie.  It's those rotten (FRIGGIN' DELICIOUS!!!!!!) curly fries that'll get you.  A SMALL is 450 calories.  FOUR HUNDRED FIFTY CALORIES IN A SMALL.
What could I have done to prevent mowing down an extra meals' worth of grub at lunch?  Planned ahead, kimosabe.  Knew going in that those little spirals from heaven were such calorie bombs.  The thing that makes me roll my eyes at myself is that I have my damn phone and my little myfitnesspal app.  All. The. Time.

So, here's to another goal.

Starting this Sunday, I will make a meal plan for at least three meals next week.  NOT counting lunches - I will be making my own version of the unbelievably good Jimmy John's Unwich.  Not because I think I can do it better than they can (that's just foolish!), but because I'm cheap.  And because it's weird to go to JJ's five days a week.  It's strange when the peeps at the food joints know you.  Particularly the crazy happy folks at Jim's.
I will also strive to do a better job of pre-planning when it comes to impromptu lunches away from my fake JJ wiches.  I will look at the menu for wherever we're going, and I will figure out what the best thing I can eat is.  And then I'll possibly plan to take a run at the elliptical after the DVD of ass-kicking.  You know, depending on what the outcome of my little jaunt into the world of eating out.

There's my promise!  I really want to re-dedicate myself to this eating better thing.  I NEED to re-dedicate myself.  Stepped on the scale at work, and am down another two pounds, so I'm pretty excited.  I'm finally getting over that middle-of-the-10 hump that I seem to get myself jammed into.  I'm now on the lower end of the 10!  Woo!  I want to keep that momentum going into the summer and the getting outside and doing stuff for several months.

Anyone have any tricks for being more attentive to their meal planning?  I kind of think it's going to end up being like working out - where I just have to say to myself:  "Self?  We're doing this" and just do it. 

5.24.2011

Grateful!

Oh yeah.

I'm grateful for plenty of things this week.

  • Garden stores are my #1 this week.  Last week I blabbed about getting two types of Heirloom tomatoes.  Guess what, suckas?  I got FOUR types - plus good 'ol Early Girls and a cherry.  STOKED.  Brandywine, Black, Striped German, Yellow Pear (which I suspect is NOT heirloom - Mom?).  I'm so ready to be in tomato heaven.  Next up:  prepping the beds and planting.  I can't wait for the weekend!

  • TREES!  This is playing off #1, but I'll take it.  We bought a crabapple tree!  I'm so very exited.  It looks kind of cold and forelorn out there in the front yard.  I kind of want to make sure it's gonna make it before I continue with my "island garden" plan.  I'll probably take this year just to look at and love that little tree (and pray my ass off that it lives!!!) and plan what else I want to go around it (perennials, I'm lookin' at you!) for next year.  We also pulled our poor little apple out of the hole it was in.  The dummies that we bought the house from apparently thought it was a great idea to plant the little bugger almost a foot in the ground.  Ummmm...what???  In non-draining clay?  Friggin' geniuses.  At any rate, we pulled that baby out.  We're keeping our fingers crossed that the two little trees will cross-pollinate and we'll have some apples next year!

  • The Mountain pose.  I'm not even kidding when I say I've pulled this pose a couple of times in the bathroom this last week.  There's just something about standing there, thinking about how I'm breathing, to calm me down and make me get back to workin' it.

  • Next:  LISTS.  I'm relying on these more and more lately.  Maybe I should rely on my DS Brain Age a little more.  HA.  Seriously though - I love, love, LOVE lists lately.  Every morning, I make a new list.  Every afternoon, I assess said list and see where things are at.  Then, I make another list.  I love lists.  I have lists for stuff that needs to happen at home too.

  • Better Homes and Gardens.  From magazines to cookbooks, to gardening bibles.  I adore that publication.  Right now, I have two BHG mags, the aforementioned bible, and a cookbook sitting near me.  Sticky notes and bookmarks in all of them.

  • My Dyson.  That little powerhorse kicks some serious ass.  We've put it through the ringer this week, and it's still taking it.  But, I suppose that's what it's supposed to do, right?  Per the commercials and all.

  • In the spirit of the Badger Herald, I'll give an Anti-Shout Out (or ASO, for those in the know...) to the weather lately.  WTF, man.  As if it's not bad enough that my poor little yard is clay-ful and doesn't properly drain from just a little downpour, I also have to deal with constant rain this spring.  I'd like to plant my garden sometime soon.  That would be great.

Well, that's about it, kids.  Have another great week!

Seriously.

Time to get it together.

How long have I been blogging now?  No, really.  I'm not checking.  A couple of months?  Sure.  I've been waxing poetic about my (often mis)adventures in the fit world for a while now.  Acting like I know what I'm doing.  Doling out advice with little snippets of sheer genius.  But even though I've put up a little post about my goals and being more consistent and all that jazz, it's still not working 100%.

Hmmm.  Is there a lesson in all of this?  Of course there is.  A person can't be On all the time.  Eventually, that bulb burns out, and you're left more than Off - you're left frustrated and angry at yourself and disappointed.  "Why can't I do this?  Why am I not strong or good enough?"  All that negative talk is bad news.  All it does is derail the train to Awesometown.

Frankly, I'm struggling with the Effits.  As in, Eff It.  Things at work are seriously picking up.  Some days (like today, por ejemplo), I don't even get to stop working, much less leave my desk for lunch.  I worked over 9 hours today.  It's a busy time, and all that busyness makes me antsy - I feel like I'm not getting everything accomplished that I want to get done, and that sort of spirals into my personal life, no matter how much I want to keep it out.  Picking fights with Hubbs, being pissed about every little thing the dog does...it's irritating as all get up, frankly.  It DEFINITELY rolls over into working out and eating well.  For example, I'm currently writing this, drinking not my first, but my second Surley (Bender, because I know you're gonna ask) beer.  Why?  Because I had a 300-calorie lunch, so Eff It.

Therein lies my problem.

Consistency.  Sticking to it.  Moral aptitude?  Maybe.

I need to figure out how to be at 100% all the time.  I have the desire to be better at this.  That's gotta count for something, right?  Maybe that's the first step?  Knowing that I want to be better than I am must be the first step to getting to 100%.

Anybody else got a way that they get themselves to 11?

For the love of God, please share!

Also, I feel that it should be noted that I'm watching "The Best Thing I Ever Ate" on the Food Network.  It's about the best fried chicken.  It's like everything is working against me tonight!  Bah.

5.22.2011

Holy. S.

So, I'm not big on giving too many specifics about myself, since this is a totally open blog.  I'm not thrilled about the idea of giving too much away.  You know, things like where I live, names, etc.  I'm not to that point of bloggy openness yet.  :)

Also included in this little list are little personal items like weight, measurements, etc.  Part of it is that I don't like to make myself too transparent (I'm a woman of mystery.  ha!).  Part of it is probably that I just don't want to deal with saying a lot of things out loud in type.

One of those little items is my actual clothing size.  I'm about to break the rules and just put a little more than I want to out there, but I'm just really excited about it.  It sort of feels worth it to say write it.  Without further ado, the reason I'm writing.

It's been a while since I've been able to walk into your average Old Navy and just buy a pair of pants off the rack.  Too small.  By more than just a little.  Ish.  I don't even like saying it.  Writing it, whatever.  I've been able to wear shirts from most "regular" stores, but not pants.  No way.  AND, I suppose I should point out that shirts haven't exactly been "lose" or "well-fitting" either.  But today, not only did I buy a swim suit (that doesn't fit right - my lovely lady lumps do NOT look awesome in that bad boy.  BUMMER) and a cute linen shirt, but I bought a pair of jeans.  They're just a small bit too tight for my comfort, but DANG if I didn't buy 'em.  A regular pair of jeans.  NOT a plus sized pair of jeans.  Off. The. Rack!

This is awesome.  I'm far more pumped about being able to buy a $22 pair of jeans than anyone should ever be, but whatever.  I'm so much more motivated to keep this thing going than I was before.  I mean, this is HUGE!  I'm so much closer to my goal than I really realized, and that's really exciting.  Without even really noticing it, I've lost enough weight to be only a few pants sizes closer to where I want to be.  I just can't wait till I'm able to say that I'm even closer in a few weeks.  By the time sister T gets married next year, I'm going to be thin enough to actually look DECENT in a bridesmaid dress!!

I still haven't gotten around to taking a good follow-up picture of myself to show how things are looking since the pic of me in October in Europe.  I'm working on it.  :)

5.19.2011

Just a quick note

On Tuesday, I wore the shirt that I wore to interview at my current job in 2007.  IT WAS BIG.  It was actually a small bit snug on me when I interviewed, so I'm totally over the moon.  I also realized that I've lost roughly 25lbs since December!  Yeah, I know that's not a whole lot in the grand scheme of things, but it's been coming off steadily and hasn't come back.  That's kind of awesome!  I'm not entirely certain what my weight was when I first started all this, but I definitely feel like the "since December" weight is what I've noticed most.  I love it.

Since we're chatting about clothes, I'm going to keep going.  For the first time in...HISTORY, I think! I wore a skirt to work.  Me.  A skirt.  This super cute red and white toile number I got for a whopping $6 at the same place where I got my love-of-my-life jeans.  And I got a ton of complements on it, so even thought it's kind of big (SCORE!!!), it's going to stay.  Since I only paid $6 for the thing, I'm pretty much okay with getting it tailored down the road a bit.

That's about it for now.  Spring planting and cleaning and sprucing has been taking up most of my evenings, so I've been lame about posting once again.  I'm hoping to get an update pic sometime - maybe in the world's greatest jeans?!  :)

Anyone else out there have any success stories??

5.16.2011

Another week, another crop of things I'm grateful for!

It was so lovely today that I don’t even want to write a post – I just wanna BASK.

But, since it’s Monday and all…
  • I’m grateful for my coffee-making hubby.  Dude makes me coffee every morning before work, while I get myself all kinds of pretty.  Or, at least it’s-7AM-and-I-have-to-go-to-work pretty.  Funny story:  a couple of weeks ago, I got to the bottom of my cup ‘o’ happiness, and got a mouthful of grounds.  I sent Mr. P an email, thanking him for making me coffee, and subsequently asking him if he could be so good as to leave the grounds out next time.  His response:  “Think of them as little bits of love I sprinkle in your coffee.”  Ha!  PS – I’m totally going to make some kind of art out of that…
  • I don’t know if you know this about me, but I can be a *smidge* pushy when I want something.  This particular time around, I wanted heirloom tomatoes.  So, I abandoned Mr. P to go home and mow the lawn and went to the great little nursery down the road.  AND GOT TWO DIFFERENT TYPES!!  Black and Striped German or something?  I don’t really remember the names off-hand, but I’m over the moon about having gotten them.  So what if we don’t get to eat out this week – I got my tomatoes!  Hmm.  Is this item being thankful for being pushy or for Mr. P putting up with me?  Or for my little nursery down the road for still having heirlooms?  I’ll go with numero tres.
  • Next up:  friends with connections.  Like my friend cablanch and her rain barrel connection.  That’s right folks – we’re rain barrel-having hippies!  Love it.  I’m really excited to gather it up from her and plant it in the backyard.  It’s kind of super bright blue, but a little spray paint will fix that right up.  I’ve been wanting one for a while now, and I’m really excited to finally get one!  Go, team eco!
  • Sprinklers.  They give me something to laugh (hysterically) at.  Dog thinks that they’re something to be murdered now.  When the heads pop up (we have an in-ground system), he wants nothing more than to eat them and the water than shoots out of them.  The garden hose too now.  Hopefully, I can catch a video of him doing it.  He seemed to know that we were trying, and stopped as soon as we hit the record button yesterday.  Sneaky devil.
  • I’m really grateful for people who understand where I’m coming from and can share my frustration.  I’ll not go into it more than that.  Sorry for the cryptics.  J
  • Extra’s newest Dessert Delights gum.  It’s Orange Crème Pop, and it’ll knock your socks off.  IT TASTES LIKE TANG!!!  It’s not like the mint chip ice cream one (where it actually tastes pretty much exactly like the dessert!), but it’s amazing.  If I could chew this gum for the rest of my life, I’d be friggin’ thrilled.  I hope you hear that, Extra gum folks.  Ha.
  • On that same note, electronic toothbrushes.  I love you, Oral B 5000.  Look ma!  No cavities!

That’s about it.  Hope you were able to enjoy the sun as I was not – stupid dentist appointment.

5.13.2011

What's that?

You think my ass looks slammin' in these new jeans?

ME TOO!!!!!!!!!

Seriously though.  Feel free to look again.  Do I need to strike a pose for you?  Oh, okay.  If you insist.

I've been needing to get some new jeans for a while now.  I've never been a jeans kind of girl.  I always wore khakis or (in my college years...) "lounge" pants.  For probably at least a good 7 years, I didn't even OWN a pair of jeans.  No joke.  I don't know why.  I had khakis in several different colors that I wore instead.  Or my superfavoriteI'mprobablygoingtodiewhenIgettooskinnyforthem Caffeine cargo sweats.  I think it was the fact that jeans usually = belt time.  Chubby girl = hell no, I'm not wearing a belt.  Draw more attention to THAT region?  Oh, I'm good.

In the last couple of years, I've expanded my pants selections.  Partly due to work (we have a casual Fridays-only environment), partly due to the fact that I've expanded so that my technicolor dream pants no longer fit.  Wearing dress pants M-Th really makes a girl reconsider the Friday attire.  So, I got jeans.  Just a couple of (ill-fitting) pairs.  Then I got a pair of trouser jeans that I love.  Then they got too big and I had the chubby girl rubby-inner-thighs blowout situation.  Talk about bummed.  I got a smaller pair, but lately those are looking a little worn and getting too loose (score!!).

SO, I made a run at a local "resale" shop called Clothes Mentor.  They have a pretty vast selection of clothing for smaller ladies.  They DO having clothing up to size 26, so it's not like they don't carry my size (no, I'm NOT telling you my size here).  It's just that their clothing selection goes down as the sizes go up.  It's certainly not the fault of the store, but of clothing designers (neither here nor there...perhaps we can get into this some other time...).  I usually have some moderate success when I go in there.  Reasonable prices keep me coming back, looking for that jackpot.

Lemme tell you, kids.  I HIT THE JACKPOT!!!
Going back to these jeans and how fabulous they look on me - they look great.  I'm seriously in love with them.  They're a darker (perhaps brown-washed?), lightweight denim that's been distressed.  Fitted through the leg with a slight bootcut at the bottom.  Here's the kicker though.  The legs AND waist fit me perfectly.  That's freaking unheard of!  Usually the waist is a size small in order to fit my legs or the legs are a size small to fit the waist.  Stupid apple shape.

When I got home, I was desperate to find out more about the jeans.  I need more pairs of these magic pants!  I Googled.  And found the brand online.  I paid $10 for them, which is a pretty good deal for jeans.  I was honestly thinking that they were going to be more expensive jeans (because Clothes Mentor is kinda brand-snobby.  Which I dig.).

The kicker:  The first place I noticed they were listed was SEARS.  FOR $11.64!!!!!  ha!  My gast had been flabbered.  How could this perfect, fabulous pair of jeans have come from a store known better as a hardware store than a department store?!  And how were they less than $12?!  ha.  I'm still cracking up over it.  Oh, in case you wondered, the next Google hit was at KMart.  KMART!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

At least I know where I can find more of these things.   :)

Oh, did I mention that they're a size smaller than what I "currently" wear?  WHAT UUUUUP?!  1 more step closer, kids.

5.10.2011

Grateful. Or, Lateful...

The grateful list!

I’m getting really bad at actually posting these on Mondays.  I was busy working out yesterday though, so I’m giving myself a pass on this one.  ha.

Things I’m grateful for:
  • IT’S 80 FRICKIN’ DEGREES OUT THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!  The second this is posted, I’m going outside and frying in the sun.  Not exactly as weight-loss-inducing as, say, going for a run, but DANG if it isn’t something I’m looking forward to.
  • The proprietor of the blog “Bower Power.”  She’s got a new post about Pottery Barn’s design books.  Maybe I should put this into a category called “DANG YOU!”  I am in lust for these books.  So, if you feel like getting me a “hey, congrats on squeezing it into those smaller jeans” gift, feel free to get me one of these.  Any of them.  All of them.  There are a ton of them!  WANT.
  • NOT my cats.  Someone decided to dig in the garden seedlings yesterday.  Beans and baby lettuces EVERYWHERE.  Jackasses.  However, since this is a post about being grateful or whatever, I’m grateful for the water bottle.  Dig in that, turds.
  • My parents!!  Thanks for the lawnmower, kids.  Mr. Peavs loves it already.  I love it too, as I believe it will mean that we WON’T be the WT neighbors without the mowed lawn.  Ha.  In addition, a special shout-out to Daddy-o for A) packing it into his truck and B) letting us borrow said truck.  It came in handy with the gathering of the materials to finish making our bed and the materials to build the raised garden beds.  For those of you playing along at home, that’s two tasks closer to being able to fully check a couple of items off our lists.  WHAT UP!?
  • To a certain unnamed faster-food chain.  My lunch yesterday made me feel like ass.  It inspired me to workout harder (and with the window open for added sweat-inducing heat!) and to eat a much better dinner.  I’m not saying I’m going to use you as a catalyst for being healthy more often, I’m just saying it worked this one time.
  • The baby geese at work.  SO STINKIN’ CUTE!!!  They make me all kinds of happy.  I just wanna squeeze ‘em.  And kiss their little beaks.  I like little baby animals.
  • Sunroofs.  Sunrooves?  Either way, I love you.  You make the drive home so glorious.  Keeping you open keeps me from having to have an actual conversation with Hubs on the way home from work.  I KID!  Sort of.  Plus, I feel like I’m getting super cheap highlights when the sun hits the top of my head.  I love sun-warmed hair.
Ummm…that’s enough.  I wanna get out and bask in the glory of the sun…  :D  GET OUT THERE AND ENJOY IT YOURSELF!

5.09.2011

Water Boy! Errr..Girl.

I'm a smidge proud of myself, kids.

The past two weeks, I have successfully taken down a full Nalgene of water at work.  Yes, it's not as if I've accomplished a great feat like learning to parasail or eating a whole Hot 'n' Ready pizza, but it's kind of awesome.  Water is a big part of getting healthy.  Word on the street is that the average person needs something in the nighborhood of 100 ounces a day from food and beverages.  That's nearly twice what everyone thinks they need to drink.  The 'ol 64 ounces seems to be a little more myth than everyone thought.

I'm doing what I can to try and get down as much as I can.  The whole salad-for-dinner thing is helping, but really the biggest thing that helps is drinking that dang water!  I'm also trying to get down another jug of water at home.  I'm avoiding the whole soda thing as much as I can (and have actually been pretty successful lately!!), and only have two couple of cups of coffee right away in the morning.  Caffeine is a water sucker, so I try to keep myself away from it if I can.

Anywho.  I just wanted to share that it's been two whole weeks of me kicking ass with my new water drinking kick.  I really hope to keep it up.  It wasn't listed as one of my new goals, but I really should have!

Anyone else accomplishing something lately?  Just wanna pat me on the back for mine?  Feel free, friends!  :)

5.08.2011

Mixin' it up

I've discovered a new vice.

The Cooking Channel.  It's pretty much the Food Network (they're sister stations), but new and different shows and personalities.  Well, and Emeril.  Natch.

I totally dig it because it's reminding me that I LOOOOVE food.  :)

Things have gotten kind of boring in the food department 'round here.  We've been healthing (yes, I invented a word.  Revel in it) things up around here a lot lately, so "good" food has kinda been pushed aside.  That's not to say that one can't have good food that's also healthy - it's just more difficult.  We've definitely been taking the easy road and getting sort of lazy with making food.  Chicken and a salad?  Check.  Chicken and steamed veggies with couscous?  Check.  Chicken on the grill with zucchini, squash, and onion?  Check.

Yeah.  See?

Why not something awesome like the Coq au Vin from Eating Well?  Or the fish tacos from Eating Well?  What about the pork medallians with cranberry and fig chutney from BHG?

There are a ton of great recipes out there that are actually great for you.  The pork medallians are only 185 calories (for 3 oz)!!  That's pretty great.  I'm totally down with that.

So, my friends, I'm going to strive to have something interesting for dinner more often.  The roast is good, but using unusual ingredients might just kick it up to the proverbial next level, you know?  Stay tuned!  :)

PS - after I wrote this, my dear hubby finished making dinner - complete with pear and walnut salad.  SCORE!  It's working already!!

Some stuff I wrote recently.


Recently, I was chatting with a bestie about the struggles we’re both going through to try to lose weight.  She and I were commiserating on what a serious pain in the ass it is, and how much it sucks and hurts to have “let ourselves go” as much as we have.  I blame married life.  HA!  I kid.

During the course of our conversation, I wrote the following words.  She appreciated them, so I thought I’d plop them on the ‘ol blog to share with my gynormous audience.

Note:  I’ve doctored them up a smidge because some of it is non-applicable here.  Also, it can get a little angsty at times.  Bear with me.  J

Without further ado:


Dude, you’re preaching to the choir.  I get so mad that I have to struggle to lose two pounds when my sister and brother are both thin and fit, and can easily control their weight.  I despise looking at myself, and have taken up being the photographer rather than being in any pictures because it’s disgusting to me.  So, I know exactly where you’re coming from, trust me.  I mean, without the part about how you used to be so skinny.  I never had that.  I’ve always been fat.
Despite that, though, I realize that I absolutely can’t compare myself to anyone else.  What I’ve got and what everyone else in the world has are different.  It’s just how it is.  I would have loved to have been born a Hilton or a Winchester, but it didn’t work that way.  I would have loved to have hit puberty and shed all my baby fat and magically grown pretty.  It didn’t happen.  The sooner you can stop comparing yourself to everyone else OR to the girl of the past, the better.  You need to accept that you gained a bunch of weight, and that you now have to work to lose it.  If you can’t accept it, you’ll never lose it.  It’ll never get better, and you’ll never be happy.  This is what you have to deal with now.  OVERCOME IT.  You can’t use the excuse that you used to be able to eat whatever you want and still be skinny.  It’s not how things are anymore.  You need to learn to eat clementines instead of jelly beans and carrots instead of chips.  Once you get over how shitty it is to have to eat healthier, it turns out that it’s better – it’s delicious.  I love the way that my little Jimmy John’s lettuce wrap crunches and I don’t miss the bread scraping the roof of my mouth.  Now that I realize that I can’t taste the cheese on my Subway anyway, the 100+ calories that I save seems easy and stupid to waste.  Sure, I love the SHIT out of BBQ pork sandwiches and enchiladas, but I eat them as a treat, and only a small amount.  Even as I dole out advice though, I need to say that I DEFINITELY need to cut down on the pizza.  J  Once a week is way more than enough.  ha.
Like I said, you need to accept that this is your new reality, and work to make it change.  You’ll probably have to keep your eating in check and make sure you work out consistently for the rest of your life.  Big deal.  Someday, when people comment on how fit you look, you can take pride in knowing that you spend time exercising and maintaining yourself, rather than just stuffing your face full of sour cream and onion Lay’s and going for an occasional run.  I adore when someone asks me if I’ve lost weight.  Even A asked me about it when I saw him a couple of weeks ago.  Sure, I’ve only just started the (very slow!) climb up Kilimanjaro, but when I hit the summit, I’ll be able to look back and say “DAMN.”


I mean it all, by the way.  Every word.  We all need to stop comparing ourselves to other people and focus on our own strengths and greatness, and look at the things about ourselves that we love.  I’ll start.  I really love my knees.  I know that they’re cute under that extra fluff, and I look forward to meeting them again, and having them meet the world.  J  AFTER I’ve gotten them a little bonzed, that is.  ha!  I love my toes.  I think they’re cute.  Even those weird little toes.  I love my muscle-y legs.  They’re getting so nice again!  I also dig my face in general.  It’s already shed some of its chunk, and I’m recalling how it’s rather pretty when it’s slimmer.

PS - I tried on a bunch of pairs of pants (that I own!) last night, and found that many of the ones that have lived in my closet for YEARS actually fit!  Happy day!!!!  I have a pair of wide-legged, white pants that I’m waiting for Memorial Day to break out.  1) because you shouldn’t wear white before Memorial Day! and 2) because the gut-region is still slightly smaller than I want.  I’m hoping that a few more pounds down over the next few weeks will help with that.  I can’t wait!  I’m envisioning a new pair of navy blue espadrilles and my gray-and-white stripped Paris top to go with it.  Seriously.  It’s kind of sick how I can’t wait.

5.06.2011

A Letter to Me.

Dear me.

Hey.  How’s it going?  I love that scarf you’ve got on today.  Glad that you finally decided to join that trend.  Hope it doesn’t die out, now that you’ve joined in!

Now that the formalities are done, I’d like to talk to you about your attitude.  I would also like to talk to you about your clothes.

Let’s start with clothes, since they’re easier.  Honestly, you should consider getting new ones.  YES, you’ve gotten rid of all the stuff that you had that you never wore or that was too big or that you won’t ever wear once you’re able to squeeze into them again.  Brava.  HOWEVER, you need to reconsider a lot of the things you’re currently wearing.  Example:  the pants you wore to work yesterday.  If you need to pull them up every four steps, it’s probably time to get a new pair.  God didn’t give you an ass.  Just deal with the fact that your pants will probably forever be too small in the waist and baggy everywhere below.  If the pants are too baggy in the waist, let’s just think about how the “everywhere below” looks.  Not awesome, friend.  Not awesome at all.  Let's work on that, okay?  You need to accept that you’ll just have to use “poofy” shirts until you have no gut anymore.

Now, on to your attitude.  This one is a little trickier.  I know you realize that you need to be absolutely conscious of every item you put into your mouth.  But saying “meh” as often as you to needs to stop.  You can’t “meh” working out.  You can’t “meh” pizza for the second time this week.  You can’t “meh” Reese’s Eggs (damn you, eggs…).

You should applaud yourself for the strides you’re taking and have taken.

However, you shouldn’t use the happiness you’ve got now, and the success you’ve seen thus far to make an excuse to slack.  You need to use that as motivation to keep going strong.  You need to keep being proud of yourself, and keep moving forward.  You know darn well how long it’s taken to get you even this far.  One pants size isn’t enough.  One isn’t where you wanted to stop.  You want to be much smaller.  You want to keep going.  You need to take this opportunity to be totally pumped, and use your elation as motivation.  You always said that seeing actual results is what gets you going.  Well, here you go!  Here are your results.  Be proud of them, and keep going.  Do you note the theme?  KEEP UP YOUR GOOD WORK.  Let’s see more results, girl!

Heart you!
xoxo Moi

PS – go shopping tonight.  Get some new pants, chief.

5.03.2011

Whoopsie. Here's my gratitude!

Soooooo…

I might have forgotten to be grateful yesterday.  My bad.  In my defense, I think I posted a couple of other posts.  Or was that Sunday??  I can’t remember all the time.  I’m fairly certain I’m sleep-deprived lately – I’ve been having really weird dreams that wake me up, and I have a hard time getting back to sleep.  Maybe I should pay attention to what I’m eating before bed on those nights!

At any rate.  Here’s the weekly List de Gratefulness.  It’s Spanglish.

·    My favorite little niecey Kendall.  Here’s a pic of her chubby little baby legs (side note:  how stinkin' cute are those leggings?!!?).  She was getting hosed off after decorating her pretty little head with frosting from her first birthday party.  Those legs are carrying her across rooms now, by the way.  *Sniffle*


·    SUNSHINE.  Man, does it feel good!  We’ve had a dreary week up here in the Northwoods, so it feels DANG nice to have some sunshine.  Even if serious wind comes with it.  I’ll take what I get.  Even the pets were basking in the glory.  I didn’t hear any noise for a couple of minutes this morning, so I peeked out into the living room to see who was dead – and all four of them were just hanging in the sun beams like real animals.  It was adorable.  And no.  I DIDN’T remember to take a pic.  Fool!

·    Just barely over four weeks until my bestie Jess is in the contiguous for good!  Or, at least, until she’s got her PhD all done.  Ha!  Only a 5-hour-ish drive from me.  WOO!  I think I’ve said it before, but that’s far better than two plane rides and a chicken bus!!

·    On that note, just over 6 weeks until my other girl Jenn is back!  She’s just around for six (??) weeks, then back to teaching in ‘Nam, but we’ve got a couple of weekends (and a WEEK!!!  SQUEAL!) planned out already.  She’d better bring me some sweet knock-offs.  I need an awesome summer purse, friend.  Think hobo.  Perhaps a long cross-body.  In a fun color or pattern.  GO.  I kid!  Sort of.

·    Exclamation points.  They’ve served me well in this post.  I should consider cutting down on the coffee.

·    President Obama.  I KNOW.  Politics.  Ish.  But, a job that was a long time coming was done.  I’d chant “USA! USA!” but I’m cautious at this point still.  Optimistically cautious, but I don’t want to start any snark offs on a topic that’s completely irrelevant to my blog.  J  So, zip your face if you’re going to get politically-charged.

·    Kohl’s.  They have some serious deals.  Got the super cute shirt I’m wearing today for $4.80.  Holla!  I love a good deal, baby.

That pretty much sums it up for me, folks.  Now, get out there and enjoy the day!

My Fitness Pal! (finally...)

Okay, I promised a full post about Myfitnesspal.com.

So, without further ado, here it is!

Things I love about it.  Let me count the ways.
  1. That it's linked up to the app on my phone.  I know I mentioned that in my Grateful post of yore, but seriously.  It's awesome.  It keeps me from having any kind of excuse for not being fastidious about tracking everything I eat and all my activities.  And guess what?  It WORKS!
  2. I can find pretty much anything on the food list.  And if I can’t, I can add it myself!  Super convenient.  It’s nice for when you know the calories of something someone else entered (example:  my pulled pork sandwich from lunch) is incorrect.
  3. The ability to pop in my recipes and get the calories.  It’s fantastic for things like hotdishes.  Way better than doing it all in my head, anyway!  J  You just add in all the ingredients you used, and then add in the number of servings, and voila!  Calories out.
  4. There are chats and blogs and all kinds of different tools to help you connect with other people who are gettin’ their fit on too.  It’s kind of Facebook-y in that you have a news feed, and can add “friends” to your page.  You can also add one of those little ticker thingies that all the preggos use to show their baby’s progress.  Except, you know, for your weight loss.  You can even upload your own pics and such.
I know that there are more great things about the website than what I have above, but this is what I’ve got for right now.  Here are some screen shots!  Sorry that they're kinda fuzzy...

This would be a shot of what it looks like when you start entering your own recipe into the system.  To add more ingredients, you just click "add ingredient" and it takes you to a similar screen to the one right below.


This shot is what it looks like when you enter in a food to search for it.  You'll note the list for "hamburger" goes on and on!  Sometimes, more specific = better.

And last but not least, a shot of searching for an exercise.  The thing I like about it is that you can adjust the actual calories burned if it's not quite matching up with your numbers.  I've learned that I burn more calories (based on my chunk) than what they have listed - so I can just simply make the correction to the actual calories on the right, and when I add the exercise, the program saves it as I've entered it.  Sweet.

Sooooo...go out and make your own account (it's free, after all!) and we can be friends!  Rather than put my username out there for the world, ask if you want to hook up on the 'net, and we can find each other.

Pssst - if you want more information, just check out the site!  Screen shots grabbed from myfitnesspal.com.

5.02.2011

More goals!

SO.  There comes a time in a weight loss journey when one must re-assess one's goals.  For me that time is now.  As I'm sure the title gave away.  Subtlety is not my forte.

The last time I wrote about my goals, I mentioned things like wanting to wear my favorite skirt again, and to be able to squeeze into a backseat full of other people without feeling like a tank.

While those are great goals, I think it's also important to think about other, more specific goals.  Like having a goal to post all of my food intake actually on the day that I eat it, rather than trying to think it all up a couple of days later.  You tend to forget things like Twizzlers on the way to the grocery store (DAMN!).  Here's an updated list of my little goals.

To be fit enough to snowboard again (original list re-visit)

To look at myself in pictures and not be disappointed (re-visit)

To make sure that I'm down my goal of 3500 - 7000 calories a week.  3500 calories = 1 lb of fat.  Gross.

To spend fewer than 2 hours a day sitting on my duffer after work.  I've got lists in the works of things I can do to keep myself occupied - ranging from dusting literally every surface in the house to yard work to meandering around Target (my wallet and my husband both say "NO" to that one.  Ha!).

To post on this little blog at least three times a week.  What's the point of even having the thing if I can't be consistent, right?  This applies to many different aspects of this whole weight loss thing, of course.  :)

To get to the point where I get through the whole evil Jillian DVD at the "beginner" level and get to the next level.  And then get to the more advanced levels.  And then start the second DVD...  Okay, gotta pump the breaks!  I want to be able to get through it more easily within the next two weeks.  I figure I can do the DVD at least 3 times a week (any more, and I think I might not get the benefit out of it as my muscles get used to it) for the next two weeks, and get to a point where I don't do it at the uber-beginner level anymore, and can do the exercises as-is.  I’ve already started doing some of the moves (like the rolling side planks – where you move from doing the plank on one side to switching to the other side at a Jillian Michaels pace) at higher than an “I’ve never worked out before” level, but there are some moves that I still need to get rocking.  I think I can do this within two weeks.

I’ve also considered doing something a little radical, and posting my intake and exercise information daily.  I think that’ll be really, really, REALLY boring though, so I hesitate.  Thoughts?

Suck it.

BMI, you can kiss my butt.

I mean, seriously.  I’m patting myself on the back for what I’ve accomplished so far.  For plenty of people, what I weigh now would send them into panics.  But for me, I’m down to a new 10.  That’s something for me to celebrate.  I’m proud of myself.  This is no small feat.  Knowing that I should probably know all my numbers, I think, “let’s check out what my BMI would look like at the goal that I’m thinking I want to see.”

And then a small part of me dies.  I punch in 150lbs which, for the record, I think could be possibly even skinnier than I think I would be comfortable – I’ve NEVER been that thin in my “I’m done growing” life!  IT’S STILL CONSIDERED OVERWEIGHT.  You have GOT to be kidding me.  I’m not a small-boned, petite lady.  I am muscled and have bigger bones.  Seriously – you should feel my thighs.  Gymnasts have flabbier thighs (possibly a *slight* over-exaggeration…).  If I was a dainty girl, yes.  I could see 150 for a 5’5” woman being overweight still.  But not me, friends.  That’s just not my body type.

I know that I should take things like the BMI with a grain of salt.  But it’s really hard to when I’m proud of myself, and then I see that stupid calculator.  When I went to a doctor a good 3 years ago about losing some weight (ouch…good to see I’ve been successful…), he told me that the medical community generally frowns on using the BMI alone for calculating healthy weight.  He said that the Fed was working out a new kind of calculator that took into account your body type and muscle mass.  I’ve been waiting for that little calculator to surface.  I’m bummed it hasn’t yet, because I could use another calculator to be able to track my weight loss and as another incentive to keep on losing.

So, until they come out with something that’s more accurate, I’ll just be using that scale and measuring tape to track my progress.

Stupid BMI calculator.