Seriously.

Time to get it together.

How long have I been blogging now?  No, really.  I'm not checking.  A couple of months?  Sure.  I've been waxing poetic about my (often mis)adventures in the fit world for a while now.  Acting like I know what I'm doing.  Doling out advice with little snippets of sheer genius.  But even though I've put up a little post about my goals and being more consistent and all that jazz, it's still not working 100%.

Hmmm.  Is there a lesson in all of this?  Of course there is.  A person can't be On all the time.  Eventually, that bulb burns out, and you're left more than Off - you're left frustrated and angry at yourself and disappointed.  "Why can't I do this?  Why am I not strong or good enough?"  All that negative talk is bad news.  All it does is derail the train to Awesometown.

Frankly, I'm struggling with the Effits.  As in, Eff It.  Things at work are seriously picking up.  Some days (like today, por ejemplo), I don't even get to stop working, much less leave my desk for lunch.  I worked over 9 hours today.  It's a busy time, and all that busyness makes me antsy - I feel like I'm not getting everything accomplished that I want to get done, and that sort of spirals into my personal life, no matter how much I want to keep it out.  Picking fights with Hubbs, being pissed about every little thing the dog does...it's irritating as all get up, frankly.  It DEFINITELY rolls over into working out and eating well.  For example, I'm currently writing this, drinking not my first, but my second Surley (Bender, because I know you're gonna ask) beer.  Why?  Because I had a 300-calorie lunch, so Eff It.

Therein lies my problem.

Consistency.  Sticking to it.  Moral aptitude?  Maybe.

I need to figure out how to be at 100% all the time.  I have the desire to be better at this.  That's gotta count for something, right?  Maybe that's the first step?  Knowing that I want to be better than I am must be the first step to getting to 100%.

Anybody else got a way that they get themselves to 11?

For the love of God, please share!

Also, I feel that it should be noted that I'm watching "The Best Thing I Ever Ate" on the Food Network.  It's about the best fried chicken.  It's like everything is working against me tonight!  Bah.

A Letter to Me.

Dear me.

Hey.  How’s it going?  I love that scarf you’ve got on today.  Glad that you finally decided to join that trend.  Hope it doesn’t die out, now that you’ve joined in!

Now that the formalities are done, I’d like to talk to you about your attitude.  I would also like to talk to you about your clothes.

Let’s start with clothes, since they’re easier.  Honestly, you should consider getting new ones.  YES, you’ve gotten rid of all the stuff that you had that you never wore or that was too big or that you won’t ever wear once you’re able to squeeze into them again.  Brava.  HOWEVER, you need to reconsider a lot of the things you’re currently wearing.  Example:  the pants you wore to work yesterday.  If you need to pull them up every four steps, it’s probably time to get a new pair.  God didn’t give you an ass.  Just deal with the fact that your pants will probably forever be too small in the waist and baggy everywhere below.  If the pants are too baggy in the waist, let’s just think about how the “everywhere below” looks.  Not awesome, friend.  Not awesome at all.  Let's work on that, okay?  You need to accept that you’ll just have to use “poofy” shirts until you have no gut anymore.

Now, on to your attitude.  This one is a little trickier.  I know you realize that you need to be absolutely conscious of every item you put into your mouth.  But saying “meh” as often as you to needs to stop.  You can’t “meh” working out.  You can’t “meh” pizza for the second time this week.  You can’t “meh” Reese’s Eggs (damn you, eggs…).

You should applaud yourself for the strides you’re taking and have taken.

However, you shouldn’t use the happiness you’ve got now, and the success you’ve seen thus far to make an excuse to slack.  You need to use that as motivation to keep going strong.  You need to keep being proud of yourself, and keep moving forward.  You know darn well how long it’s taken to get you even this far.  One pants size isn’t enough.  One isn’t where you wanted to stop.  You want to be much smaller.  You want to keep going.  You need to take this opportunity to be totally pumped, and use your elation as motivation.  You always said that seeing actual results is what gets you going.  Well, here you go!  Here are your results.  Be proud of them, and keep going.  Do you note the theme?  KEEP UP YOUR GOOD WORK.  Let’s see more results, girl!

Heart you!
xoxo Moi

PS – go shopping tonight.  Get some new pants, chief.